This song feels like rain washing away your heartaches. Vibe with it. There is a meditation we do called heart breaths, my therapist and I. In it, I am meant to gather all the love around me in the air, and envision it as a color. All the energy inside my body I see I …
Continue reading Hearing Color
At the grocery store this week, a woman dropped a box of blueberries. They went everywhere. She was too old to pick them up, and people up and down the aisles just stopped and stared. I just stopped and stared. Her trembling voice, shouting “Cleanup—I need a cleanup!” Embarrassed. Close to tears. Fucking blueberries. All …
Continue reading Feeling Blue[berries]
I intended to do far more writing while abroad. Until I got sick. Ibiza offers far too little sleep, and far too many other things. And after I got sick, I got sick with something else. Then sick with something else, and it seemed the illnesses came in waves. I’m a fragile little bird. However, pharmacies …
Continue reading With Candles Lit by Tears
The only thing I couldn’t leave New York without seeing was the World Trade Center Memorial. It’s worth the trip, for that alone. Never have I felt such heartache as I did in that moment. The grief living in those gaping holes is profound. It’s staggering. It will bring you to your knees. It did …
Continue reading Thinking of You
I have cried every day this week. I'm wondering when tears will stop. A few months ago, when I was feeling this way, I just became disconnected. People noticed. Asked me why I wasn't posting on the blog. Why I wasn't writing. Why I wasn't answering texts or calls. Today, I've decided that …
Continue reading Remodeling the Soul
I’m about to annoy the hell out of most of you. Personally, I don’t really care. Three hurricanes and an (at least) 8.0 Earthquake off the coast of Mexico. An entire Caribbean island has been wiped off the map. Thousands of homes are under water, or clogged by sands. This isn't the world I grew …
Continue reading 10 Things I hate about…how we treat our world
So I just finished watching a movie instead of studying for my state EMT exam, because of course I did. Anyway, the closing line was, "We don't need you to make us feel safe, because you made us feel brave." And I was talking to my boyfriend, and he said that we don't have a …
Continue reading A Note on Fear
I have had, I think, the most interesting couple of days—days that taught me about relationship, and about connection. I’ve witnessed desperation, depravity, sadness, hopelessness, all in the span of 48 hours. To say I am emotionally exhausted is, perhaps, a perfectly understated description…hence the coffee. I’ve always argued that you never have to travel …
Continue reading Coffee House Musings
The Wild Heart of Life 